Another Chapter in my Life Closed...Yet Again...

Yup...I know. I have resigned again from another company. This is really starting to become a habit but one I really don't want to get addicted to.

I do have several reasons why I left though. Despite the high salary, I don't think that they still pay me enough to do what I had been doing for them. (Although, if my sister would read this, she would wish that she was back in Manila to whack me in the head since she has been doing almost the same thing in government salary...although, I would say that it doesn't really count since the reward from all her suffering is an assignment in the Laplands where as here I am...still in the same place where people have left me).

At my defense I really did try to suck it up and just keep at it just for the sake that I have something to bring home to every pay day. But it just got to the point that sucking isn't really doing it anymore. As I enumerate the reasons, I know a lot of them are really shallow but heck, to each his own:

1. I haven't been able to breathe properly for the longest time. In fairness to them, I have been having trouble even before I got there. But when I started working there, it just got worse and worse everyday that it's really a struggle for me to take a breath now. I feel that no air is coming into my lungs and deep breathing which was working before isn't really working that well anymore now. As I am typing this, I try to take deep breaths but it's still feels like my lungs isn't filling up. I don't know if it was the altitude that made it worse since we were working on the 35th floor after all and the airconditioning was really strong and pointed at me that I might be suffering from Carbon Dioxide poisoning of some sort.
2. Cockroach infestation. The whole building I think is literally crawling with them that everywhere I go I would see one crawling. We kept on spraying Baygon everyday before we go home but they still come and they always bring a friend with them. It was tolerable at first right until my last day, we have been whacking cockroaches one after another. I fear that even the water that we drank have some sort of contamination from them.
3. I have so many bosses. Well, that couldn't be helped since I was after all handling their travels. But it got to the point that they expected me to be 5 people all at the same time. My greatest respect to Jaja for doing that everyday for I think 3years already. She's indeed Superwoman but I guess when it comes to this, I am human after all.
4. Handling of travels made me teary eyed. I have known for a long time now that my sister was leaving the country before she actually had a specific date. So, an emotional person that I am, it was really hard to look at passports, looking for flights, asking about Schengen Visas and everything without me thinking that my older sister would be leaving soon. And it's not really just my sister...my younger brother is also planning on leaving the country as well. So my whole family would be away leaving me here. It's just hard to concentrate at work when you have that looming at the back of your mind everyday.
5. I still work even during lunch break. Since I stay in the office for lunch, any phone calls, any messengers arriving, anything work related would be done even if I have a spoon in my mouth. I was suppose to have an hour break but it would usually be reduced to 15-30 and I would immediately get back to work. I don't really have time to relax and catch up with life.
   
6. In connection with no.5, the extended work period is very frequent. Almost everyday. I get to the office at around 830 or 845 and I would go home around 7-ish. People there don't seem to have any sense of time whatsoever. And since I live far south, I get to go home around 9 or 10 depending on the traffic in SLEX.
7. I didn't get to write at all. I took this job thinking that I'd be able to scribble some stuff before I start to work since work does start at 9 but I get in the office at around 830-ish and already I needed to start working. And when I get home, I would be too tired to grab a pen. My muse has returned, and I have a lot of ideas on my mind but I have no time to put it on paper. I am afraid that my muse would leave me again because I'm not using her anymore. They did attempt to let me write articles for them on the latter part of my stay but I was out of the grove for the longest time and getting back on the horse was hard for me, especially with the kind of articles they wanted me to write.
8. I wasn't allowed to learn a different language. Actually, this was really that one that annoyed the hell out of me the most because they gave me hope that I would be allowed to study (and I didn't really care that time if it was my own expense). I went to look for a school for a foreign officemate of mine and since I was already looking I also checked out the languages that I wanted to learn. I told this to my boss and he said it was a great idea and I would be allowed to adjust my schedule so that I can attend the classes. When the day came that I already have the schedule and told my boss this, he said that it was now impossible for me to adjust my schedule. I was really annoyed. I was wishing that they told me it was impossible to begin with than have my hopes up like that only to be dashed. It honestly made me feel like I wasn't allowed to improve or progress there.
   

There are other reasons but this is like the main 8. I know that these things are really just something typical of a company but like I said, to each his own. It might be because I was so used to the gaming industry setting that veering off into the unknown was a real shock to me. But then again, an office is an office however which way you put it and I have adapted well in other places before and I had experience worse conditions that the ones mentioned above but I stuck to it. But then again, I was allowed to move up in the world in the other industry and I was allowed creative freedom there as well.

And then it also did occur to me that maybe the office setting isn't really for me and I really have to find something that doesn't really require me to stay an office the whole day. Health wise, the conditions in that office was really bad, I'm really afraid that I might not breathe properly anymore.

Anyway, I am waiting for something in January. Although I am crossing my fingers that it will push through. In the meantime, my sister left me with a lot of things to do for the house that I'm making that my priority while I'm on break. And here's hoping that I could squeeze in a writing gig or two.